I'm 1dp5dt and I'm having trouble feeling overly optimistic about success this cycle. I just got the call from the embryologist that my remaining embie did not make it to freeze today... so I'm sad for my embie.
As I was in my gown, listening to my Circle & Bloom transfer meditation the doctor (not Dr. T) came in to report on my 4 embies. All 4 were still growing, but at a slower rate than normal. 3 were still at 8-cell (typical of day 3) and 1 was classified a Morula (typical of day 4), so none had made it to a day 5 blastocyst, yet.
The doctor had hopes for the Morula, it was in pre-blastocyst stage. He recommended that we use the Morula and two of the 8-cell embies for transfer. I agreed. I can't explain what it's like when you're minutes away from transfer and you get information about your embies - while doped up on Valium - and you have to make a decision about how many to transfer based on the new information. I was trying not to allow disappointment to set in just before transfer.
As far as the transfer went, I was taken back to the same operating room from my retrieval... with the "short bed" (it's like 1/2 a table because instead of foot stirrups, it uses knee stirrups). For my retrieval, once I laid down on the short bed I was asleep within seconds. For the transfer, I was awake. So they raised the bed, then raised the bottom side of the bed (just imagine the blood rushing to your head) and I just started giggling.
The speculum used initially was too short so that was a little uncomfortable. He got a longer speculum and that was much better. He threaded the catheter through my cervix into my uterus (I could see this via ultrasound on a screen). The embryologist brought in my embies in a tube that would be threaded through the catheter and they were released in my uterus. The embryologist then goes back to confirm all embies were released from the tube and yells back "okay". And that was that.
I was transferred back to the gurney and wheeled back to the prep area where I listened to my meditation again while I rested for 30 minutes.
G brought me home and stayed with me for a couple of hours. It's funny because her kids were home with their dad, who was napping, so they kept calling her because they were bored. It's all about Mom! Shortly after she left I had my post-transfer acupuncture appointment, which was wonderful.
After acupuncture I began to consult Dr. Google to learn more about transferring a Morula at day-5. Here's the scientific answer:
The morula stage is the final stage prior to formation of a fluid filled cavity called the blastocoel cavity. Once the cavitation has occurred, we can see the fluid in the cavity between the cells and we call the embryo an early blastocyst. Although morula stage embryos are usually seen on day 4 and blastocysts are usually seen on day 5, sometimes we have only morulas on day 5. In such a case, we do not know if the embryos are slower than average because they are weaker, or because they are strong and healthy but just going a little slower than average. Transferring morulas on day 5 results in a reasonable pregnancy rate, although it is not as high as the pregnancy rate with blastocyst transfer on day 5.
I did find a lot of message boards that reported success with Morula transfers and some said that sometimes the embies for Girls were slower growing (these were not statements backed up by science and the success stories I read were split about 50/50 for girl/boy's born from Morula transfer).
I have shed tears for my lost embie and now need to get back into a positive mindset that one of the little ones in my uterus is my future child. Now to stay positively occupied for day 2 of bedrest...