Thursday, January 19, 2012

Premature Preparation

The dogs have been passing a stomach bug around for the last couple of weeks.  Izzy had it first and for several nights got me up 2 - 3 times a night to go outside.  She wasn't acting like she was sick... she just stunk in general (bad gas & diarrhea), so it didn't seem to warrant a trip to the vet.  Mom was visiting and suggested we add rice to her meals.  That did the trick and she seemed (and smelled) much better by Saturday.
Faith & Izzy

Tuesday night, Faith came down with the same thing.  Initially, Faith didn't get me up to go outside.  The stench in my room was awful.  And when she did get me up, I stepped in liquid diarrhea.  Try being nauseated and clean that stinky mess up...  (thankfully this happened only the one time)

Faith got me up about every 2 hours through the night Tuesday night and last night!  She's now on a rice diet as well and seems to be doing better... we'll see how it goes tonight.

Me? I'm exhausted.  The thing is, when I get up in the middle of the night, I don't go back to sleep easily.  And with the sick dogs lately, I sleep very lightly... I hear them immediately when they need to go out.  My quantity and quality of sleep have suffered.

Obviously I see the irony of the situation.  The dogs are preparing me to be up with a baby all night.  But really, there is time for that!  I don't need to prepare for that just yet.

Today is the last day of my first trimester!

It's 8pm... I think it's time for bed.  Goodnight.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Low Risk - High Risk

*All about pregnancy*

I'm breathing a sigh of relief as I am currently classified as a Low Risk, High Risk patient.  The baby passed the NT scan with flying colors although it took a while to get the necessary measurements.  With the blood results that the nurse called me with today, risk for Downs is 1:560 and risk for Trisomy 18 is 1:10,000.  She told me I'm considered Low Risk (for a high risk patient).

Another successful milestone!  Thank you God!

The NT scan itself was a lot of fun.  Fun? you ask???  Well yes, since my friend LH came with me, it was fun.  LH always makes me laugh!

The NT scan is an abdominal ultrasound.  I was so excited to 'graduate' from the Wand.  But of course, it also requires a full bladder.  Mine was full, but needed to be a little more full.  So I kept drinking water.  The baby was fun to watch and the tech took lots of pictures.  She was really sweet and very positive, immediately telling me that everything looked good, although the doctor had to come in to log the actual measurements.

There are 3 doctors in this office and 2 were out unexpectedly with the flu.  One poor doctor was covering ALL of the appointments that day.  The only part of me that minded the extra wait was my bladder. But when he finally came in he was very personable and spent plenty of time with me.

Problem was, the babe didn't want to cooperate.  He couldn't get the right angle to get the measurements.  While I have always had a really strong bladder, I was starting to suffer, especially since trying to get the baby to move included pressing hard on my belly.  Might I add, LH was getting a kick out of this whole experience, her youngest is 7 so it's been a while since she's been through this. He finally gave me the option of filling my bladder more (not possible) or relieving my bladder and doing a vagi.nal ultrasound.

No contest.

I estimate that I've had at least 100 vaggie ultrasounds in the last 2 years.  If he was going to let me go to the bathroom, bring on Wandy!

So that's what we did.  Except it was the strangest vaggie ultrasound I've ever experienced.  Even from that vantage point, he was not getting the angle he needed.  So besides pressing on my abdomen there was also poking with the Wand (back & forth - you get the picture).  At this point, I realized how inappropriate this would be in any other situation and I couldn't contain my giggles.  Once I started laughing, LH started laughing too.  I won't go into further detail on this as my MOTHER sometimes reads this blog, hi Mom!

The good thing is that there was so much talking and joking going on the entire time between the tech, doctor, LH and me, that the reason for our added laughter was not obvious although I think the tech caught on.

Finally, the doctor got the positioning he needed for the measurement and all was good.


Wednesday, January 4, 2012

The Hangover (and Balance)

**Pregnancy discussed**

So I was driving my car tonight on my way to pick up Thai food and suddenly knew I was going to puke!  Thankfully I still had some plastic bags nearby that I used as "poop bags" when I took the dogs to Florida over the holidays.  I grabbed a bag and sure enough, puked while driving.  I know that can't be safe, but my eyes never left the road!  I am now wearing this incident like a 'badge of honor'...  my funniest pregnancy puke story to date!

I, like many others in this situation before me, am struggling with the changes I need to make to my blog.  I've watched many others struggle with this after becoming pregnant after infertility.  There is a need to balance the desire to chronicle this new world of pregnancy while being sensitive to the feelings of so many who are still in the trenches of the fight with infertility.  I will continue to try to maintain this balance but I do understand if anyone still struggling is unable to read my posts right now, I wont forget how hard it was to read some posts from those who had found success.  I did unfollow some bloggers because it was too difficult to read about their exciting new developments when I was going through disappointment after disappointment; I did check their blogs on my own time, when I felt strong enough to read their developments.  If anyone needs to stop reading or unfollow me, believe me, I understand.

The other type of balance I am working on is balancing between my fear/thoughts that something will happen vs. positivity/embracing my pregnancy.  I don't like to talk about the fear/negative things although the thoughts are with me for fear of jinxing myself.  Unless that changes, I wont be writing about my fears anytime soon.  I do try to acknowledge the negative thoughts when they come and replace them with positive thoughts, like imagine that everything goes right.

"Morning" sickness kicked in at 7 weeks.  I describe the feeling as having a hangover all day, without having the party the night before.  I don't puke often.  Some days I don't puke at all, other days I'll puke 2 or 3 times, today was a 3x's kind of day.    I don't mind the puking.  The worst part is brushing my teeth.  I don't feel like I've done my teeth justice in weeks.  I will gag/puke more often than not when brushing my teeth which in turn makes you want to brush your teeth, but the last thing I want to do is put that toothbrush near my mouth again.

I am thankful for every molecule of energy this baby has drained from me even though I look forward to the day when I get the 'burst of energy' come second trimester.  I embrace the non-party all-day everyday hangover as it's a reminder that my body is doing miraculous things.  I am thankful for every gag and puke episode as it reassures me that my body is doing what it needs to to support my little one.

I am 11weeks, 5days today.  Tomorrow I meet my MFM (Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist), aka "high risk doctor" and will have my NT scan.  My good friend LH asked me today if I wanted her to come with me.  I had not thought about not going alone, but I embraced her offer to go with me.  I love my friends!