I can feel the symptoms that AF is on her way and will be here soon. So far she is a day late from my normal short cycle, due to the progesterone, I presume.
The strange thing is that after this 3rd cycle BFN - I'm not emotional. The first two BFN's were CRAZY-disappointing! I was in tears off & on as I 'grieved' the failed cycle. This cycle I moved straight into acceptance. I think after my emotional meltdown last time around I have come to accept that this IS a process and it is all a part of the JOURNEY of motherhood.
No doubt I'm learning valuable lessons that I've not even yet recognized. The one lesson I have come to recognize is PATIENCE... I feel that I now have patience to go the distance, however far the distance may be...???
In the time it took to write this brief post, she arrived. Welcome back, Aunt Flo and the start of Cycle #4 (and a new donor, yet to be identified).
I'm sorry.
ReplyDeleteWell, crap. It would have been so cool if you got a "natural" BFP this time. Do you have a new plan already in place with your RE?
ReplyDeleteIt's good to hear you were able to deal with this BFN a little better than last time. Hopefully it's your last BFN ever!
Thanks! I would have loved to see a BFP for a natural cycle... I don't have a new plan with my RE yet. I expect she'll want me back on Clomid this month, which is fine. My 'sit down' with her is not until Monday (8/16) - too late for a strategy shift for this cycle.
ReplyDeleteThe good thing is my negative energy from the end of cycle #2 and going into cycle #3 (with my doctor communication issues). Even my vitals at my Allergist appointment today were better than they have been in months!
More to come on all of this!
Damn AF! Big bummer.
ReplyDeleteStrange as this sounds, I needed to read your post today. A great reminder to always stay hopeful, but when I do get the BFN, it won't be the end of my journey. Thank you-
Can't wait to hear all about your new donor!
negative energy from Cycle #2 is GONE.... - I was multitasking on a conference call while typing - that's the end of the sentence that I omitted!
ReplyDeletesend that ol' hag Flo my way please...
ReplyDeleteand a dose of the patience! lol
Darn AF but at least you have such a nice positive attitude heading into this. It is definitely a journey!
ReplyDeleteI went through 4 cycles and 3 donors. You'll get there. Like you said, it's a journey...you'll be one your own special path soon. I'm glad you took it better this time, it's such an emotional roller coaster!
ReplyDeleteDamn AF! She shows up when you don't want her & never arrives when you do want her...sounds like you have a really great attitude though. Good luck with the new donor picking!
ReplyDeleteThis is really nice post works well and easy to configure...thanks for all info.
ReplyDeleteLaminated Wood